Do you want to be right or happy? I’m guessing you’ve heard this before. It’s a popular question – so popular that I’m not quite sure who to attribute it to.
I most recently came across it when I was reading Deepak Chopra’s The Ultimate Happiness Prescription: 7 Keys to Joy and Enlightenment.
Can you guess what the fourth key is?
“Give Up Being Right.”
I never realized that having to be right is something that I struggle with – it’s definitely not something that I consciously do – but as I started to pay more attention to this particular concept I see most people doing it, even over the smallest, silliest things, more often than not. And, yes that includes me, too.
After reading the chapter and digesting the concept that having to be right leaves someone in the situation having to be wrong, I decided to make a conscious effort to recognize when I was doing this and to stop myself. Right vs. wrong often results in conflicts and power struggles. Those are things that drive a wedge between people – not things that build up a good partnership.
In the book Chopra explains, “to give up the need to be right doesn’t mean that you don’t have a point of view. But you can give up your need to DEFEND your point of view.”
There’s power and most importantly peace in that. I want to be a team with my husband, not the one who constantly proves him wrong.
Sure, I believe there are times when it’s appropriate and important for us to share that we’re right, Ahem, but there’s probably more times when it’s simply not necessary.
So, how about you? Do you want to be right or happy? I encourage you to pay attention to how you handle differences in your relationship and to try choosing happiness.
Winks & Smiles,